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23 Things I’ve learnt on my 23rd Birthday

Hello!

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It’s my birthday today! And I’m going to share 23 things to kick start this day. Hahaha. This is a post inspired by a blogger called Charlie! 🙂

Ok before I launch into the list, 2 updates! I got confirmed from my last job interview, and I’m going to start work this Friday! Praise The Lord! But I feel a bit worried and uneasy.. Worried that I might not feel comfortable with the job, worried that I might not perform to par. But I also am excited to start work, as I’ve “holiday-ed” for 2 months and 2 weeks now! Heheh. And also excited to contribute to society through my work and income. HAHA. 😀 second update is that I’ve sent my lappy to fix at my dad’s friend’s repair shop… Hopefully it can be fixed ! So I’m blogging from my phone now:)

Ok! Here we go!:

1. Being 23 doesn’t feel much older than say being 22.

I honestly had a whole lot of ideas for this post but suddenly have a mind blank. -.-

2. There will be fears and there will be dreams. Don’t let the fears stop you from accomplishing your dreams by taking steps one by one to make your dreams come true.

3. Friends are important but friends will also disappoint you. And when they do,
it’s ok. Your life will not topple neither will it dissolve. If there are conflicts and you have done your part to try to resolve things then breathe in, take things in your stride and move on. Recognize that God has blessed you with more than one group of friends and while some friendships may wither it also means that other friendships can blossoms!

4. Family is important to me. I may grumble at my parents and find them annoying and exasperating at times but I also love them dearly and sometimes I fear the day that they will die and wonder how I will cope with it (sorry If this is too morbid for you) but most days now I just think about how long more they have to live, how meaningful a life they have and how much I must treasure them and not waste our time together by being angry or having negative emotions.

5. It is also totally not worth it to be spiteful toward my family(or anyone). Being humorous and happy is far better. 😀 #didyouknow Humour in a relationship is what helps to resolve conflicts and allow relationships to go the distance?

6. My relationship with God is precious. Being rebellious and not spending time on quiet time because I feel that I have too much to handle is not worth it. Being dependent on him and trusting him is far more fulfilling.

7. That does not mean that everything in life and my ministry in church is perfect. But having a grounded relationship with God is the first and most important thing. That said it also doesn’t mean that I now know everything that I need to do and do them.

8. In my last 22 years I’ve swung the bat from both ends of the extreme. I’ve gone from trying to do everything. To doing nothing. But I figured doing nothing is not my style at all. Having too much time on my hands makes me uncomfortable and I don’t feel good at all. So i try to hit a balance. And taking it easy.

9. In a friendship, it takes two to tango. You can’t always be the one to initiate conversations and dinner meetings. And there’s a limit to how many times you can bear being the “pursuer” in the friendship before you feel you are devaluing yourself when the other party is unreciprocative.

10. When that happens, when you feel said friend isn’t reciprocating, it’s not always your fault. Don’t think it’s your fault. Friendship is supposed to be natural. When you have done your part and your “friend” doesn’t return the kindness and favor, you need to question why you bother and if the “friend” of yours treat you like one at all. Sometimes it’s not your friendship skills or your personality that’s the problem.

11. To develop a love relationship you need to first learn how to develop a friendship. The rules of developing a love relationship applies to a friendship as well. Best is to be friends before you become lovers. I may generalize but most guys will not spend time on you as friends if you reject them as lovers.

12. I have been single for the last/first 22 years of my life. Partly it’s because I’ve rejected guys ranging from one wanting to be my boyfriend within one week of knowing me, another still hung up on his ex, some(yes more than one, unfortunately, depending on how you see it, for me or for their gfs) still dating their gfs but will still spend time texting and asking girls out. I obviously avoid them like a virus when I find out. Partly it is also because I don’t like the guys that like me and neither do the guys that I like, like me back. 😦

Digressing: Said guy who wanted to be my bf within one week of knowing me, back when we were 15, he threatened to commit suicide if I didn’t speak to him on the phone for an hour during our O level exams period. Since then, I’ve stopped responding to anyone who will threaten me with suicide threats. I’ve learnt to encourage them to see a psychiatrist instead. :p

13. When a guy likes you, he will most definitely take the initiative to contact you. SMS, FB, whatever. You don’t have to worry, does he like you or not. You will know it. Neither do you have to worry if he will stop liking you. If he really likes you, nothing you do will make him stop liking you. But the reverse is true, if he doesn’t like you, it is unlikely that he will be touched by things you do.

14. Honesty is the best policy. Just be who you are and people will like you for it, or not. But no point pleasing people who don’t like you, and if you do, you will have to constantly do it which is not worth it at all.

15. That said, I subscribe to the policy that having a friend is better than an enemy. Don’t burn your bridges because you never know when you might need one. Although some may argue no point keeping a rotten bridge… It is also true that for the bridges I have burned before, I don’t foresee myself ever needing them. But then I may be speaking too early. Still, try not to burn your bridges.

16. I have made my fair share of mistakes. I have been rude to people who have been rude to me. But if time could turn back, I’d choose to be cordial. Some people say that’s hypocrisy. But I think that’s being polite and professional. I may not be able to control how others treat me, but I can control my response to them.

17. It’s ok to make mistakes. Really. It’s not the end of the world when you do. Just know how to learn from your mistakes and try not to repeat them and be better next time. Life is a life long learning process! 🙂

I am left with 5 points and am running out of things to say… :p

18. The Addams Family was my first musical. I enjoyed it. But I enjoyed the media call and the backstage tour with the cast even more. ^^

19. The two months of waiting for a job and the long job decision process is a humbling one. On one hand I am privileged to be able to choose what job I want, but on the other, waiting can be trying. However I am thankful because its this process that led me to my confirmed job in an industry that excites me. And also it is in waiting that my faith and trust in God is refined and increased.

20. I used to want to plan my life and have things happen “this way and that and by this time and that” but now I’ve learnt to take things one at a time and step by step. While I can still plan things in the long term, but it can be silly when God doesn’t allow it to happen. It doesn’t mean I lie back and do nothing, (I applied for this one by asking the director/boss for “a job” through LinkedIn and they just nice had a job up for fill!) but it also does mean that I am not constantly worrying what’s going to happen to me and if it happens, it will happen. If the job is going to be mine, nothing can stop me from it. But if it isn’t, then nothing can make it mine either.

21. Life is what you make it to be. Your perspective on things and on your life is one of the major determining factor of whether you can achieve “success” (no matter how you define it). As Henry Ford says, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.”

22. The people and environment we are in influence us to become who we are. We become more like the people we hang around with and the shows we watch, the books we read and the images we see. So be wise with whom you spend your time with and what you spend your time on.

Last one! So it’s going be something future-focused.

23. I may be embarking on a full time paid job but I have not lost sight of being an entrepreneur someday. I don’t know how and what I’ll be doing to get me there but I know three things for sure, 1. I’ll need to meet the right team of people, 2. provide a product or service that solves a solution and 3. overcome my fears by taking action! I may not succeed upon my first enterprise but that is a risk I will have to take when the time comes! 🙂

That is all! I hope you enjoyed reading this one!

😉

Be beautiful, inside & out!

<3,
Ena

One thought on “23 Things I’ve learnt on my 23rd Birthday

  1. Pingback: Best of 2013 & Happy New Year! | Enabalista

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