What Propels You?

Of late I have been pondering over what propels me and I am guilty of being propelled by fear. Sadly, not a noble fear of the Lord like a good christian girl should be but actually fear of failure.

It’s a fear of failure that propels me to complete my work, to attend classes, to arrange for project group meeting, to arrange for core group meetings.

I am sick of responsibilities when the people who are supposed to share them with me are not active or taking initiative to do so. I shall go on no further but I am honestly just tired and I often catch myself thinking why did God allow this to happen to me and the answer is probably because he want me to learn something from it. And I think ok something must be very wrong me with because things just don’t happen smoothly, I must not be learning the lesson that I need to learn. But I also think why must the problem lie with me? Can’t it be that I am also a victim of circumstances?

Well I’m sorry to go so deep and emo into the post so I shall reflect upon the happier things this week. I suddenly feel like this is my memory basin from Harry Potter movie, the one that Dumbledore has and stores his memory in so as to look back when he wants to. My blog is pretty much something like that except of course it’s heavily censored for public viewing. Haha.

So i’ve been busy this week because it’s formative assessment week with 3 presentations, 1 individual, 2 group and 1 essay draft submission. The individual ccs presentation went pretty ok. The first group presentation with Bini and Julie went well too so we are all really happy. Our tutors gave us pretty high grading. Circe (our guest assessor who is our head of fashion) even commented that our location of choice 313@Somerset (which costs $32 k/month btw) seems to be a poor choice because our high end concept store should be somewhere in Ion instead! Gee. What a compliment! 😀

The second marketing presentation with Shella, Shi Hui and Bini went pretty badly because we had a poor choice of structuring. Broke our hearts because we changed the structure several times and we were pretty clueless as to how to go about it. On hindsight I have a tinge of regret of not putting in more effort to seek help from friends with marketing expertise. Sigh. Will strive better next term!!! Will go all out super power bam dam slammmm bow wow our class. HAHAHAHA.

And as for essay draft, submission was friday afternoon and I only started actual writing on thursday afternoon and completed in about 4 hours, not including research which I had already done 2 weeks before. So that was uber yay for me because i usually stay up all night to do essay. But ironically even though I completed my essay right, I still stayed up till 4am so I couldnt get up for the 9am make up class…

Which is for V&P and we had our formative assessment for the actual class today from 4-7pm which dragged till 7.30pm which went pretty well. Jon Chan praised me for being responsible. heehee. Poor him because he was sick and he had to go through a whole class of individual assessment. Our teachers all seem to be getting sick one by one! Hopefully they all recover over project week because sick tutors = unhappy = poor thing students.

After a busy week, Bini and I went to catch I am Number 4 it was awesome!!! I love sci-fi action movies. And Diana Aargon is so lovely there I tell you but too bad her character quite 1 dimensional and flat.

I want to thank God for all my lovely friends in school. !!!

I am quite excited over the idea I have for my V&P submission due next wednesday. I shall now go do my research file. Yay! Byeeee.

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