When I was in one of my lowest period of my life last year, my sister, Lu Jia, wrote me a letter. I will not go into details but as I re-read the letter I went to read up more on the bible verses she quoted.
She quoted 3 passages in the bible.
4 The people to whom I am sending you are obstinate and stubborn. Say to them, ‘This is what the Sovereign LORD says.’ 5 And whether they listen or fail to listen—for they are a rebellious people—they will know that a prophet has been among them. 6 And you, son of man, do not be afraid of them or their words. Do not be afraid, though briers and thorns are all around you and you live among scorpions. Do not be afraid of what they say or be terrified by them, though they are a rebellious people. 7 You must speak my words to them, whether they listen or fail to listen, for they are rebellious.
2 Tim 4:2
2 Preach the word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction.
3 Then he said to me, “Son of man, eat this scroll I am giving you and fill your stomach with it.” So I ate it, and it tasted as sweet as honey in my mouth.
But what struck me as I was just reading these in my bible was what was between the quoted Ezekial passages in Ezekial 2:8.
8 But you, son of man, listen to what I say to you. Do not rebel like that rebellious people; open your mouth and eat what I give you.”
I am ashamed to admit that at that time I chose to rebel and refused to eat the scroll that God has given me. Although at that time I didn’t come across God’s instructions in Ezekial 2:8. I really can’t second guess if I had read that verse what I would have done. Would I have repented then, or not?
Looking back, I actually felt more upset with God after reading my sister’s letter and kind of threw it aside. For one it struck me really hard that God knows what I am going through, the words were like hammer hitting the nail home. I was told to not be afraid, despite God knowing I am tasked to preach to unresponsive, ungrateful & rebellious people, I was instructed to eat the word so that I could be prepared in and out of season to continue to do God’s work.
In my self-centredness all I could see was in my misery, God asking me to eat His word, so that I could speak to His people and that was beyond me. I felt that I needed help, I wanted attention and someone to feed me, nurse me back to health.
What I neglected to see was that only God’s word could nurse me back to health. And he was telling me to do just that. But I was blinded by my self-centredness and chose to rebel.
I thank God that I now know God’s word is powerful, that He wants to speak to me about so many more things and impart His wisdom. But I need to continue to work and persevere in my discipline to eat His scroll. I need to be inspired by those who continually feed on His word and be encouraged to do likewise. And, I need to wait upon the Lord and listen to what message He wants me to impart to the lives around me.
A long post but I hope you have been encouraged by it. 🙂
School is starting tmr (or later rather) at 11.30! I plan to go earlier to settle admin stuff and after school meet Dione to watch Kong Hee’s sermon!!! A CD Jie jie passed me eons back but in my then laisse-fairness never got down to it! Have a great and blessed week my beloved friends!